My dad is tapped into the real world. CNN is going all the time. Every once and a while when I visit he says: so what do you think about this particular thingy? And I’m like what are you talking about. At which point he rolls his eyes at crystal and says “I can’t believe you don’t know this.” I don’t really watch the news. I just don’t really find it fun. I understand the need to be informed, but sometimes I just get depressed when I hear about wars, people getting murdered, and leaders making poor decisions.
I think my dad gets a kick out of it because he then can relay the news with his angle. I like the daily show for that reason. Current events that are designed to mock and belittle. But maybe my dad is right. I need to get my head out of the clouds and come down to planet earth. I gotta face the facts. I need to look at the truth. I need to understand that life is depressing, those that who are in charge are incompetent. They are quickly blamed by those who betray them. Those that betray them are quick to understand that they are the ones with the control. With the elaborate plan that will get them to the top of the power chain
Someone is in charge… someone messed up… heads are going to roll. What is wrong with our government! I’m going to vote! Someone is to blame for my needs not being met, I’m angry, I need to do something about this.
Welcome to the last days Geoff! Not as in the last days of earth, but the last days that Jesus spent here. Days of blame, days of betrayal, days of apparent control.
For all of us there finally comes not just a last time but a whole calendar of last times – the last time we see our child, our friend. The last time we take a walk on the beach or see the rain fall. The last time we make love or write a letter, build a fire, hear our name spoken. It is part of the mercy of things that we rarely know when each last time comes, are never sure when we are saying good-bye for good. Even the old man dying in his bed believes that he will feel the touch of a human hand again before he’s done or hear the drawing of the blind, smell breakfast, drift off one more time into an old man’s dozing. For some it is given to know – the criminal watching the sun come up on the morning of his execution, the suicidal man writing his note – but even for them there must always be the wild hope that somehow a miracle will happen to save them.
But for Jesus because he believed he had to die in order to save the world, there could be no hope for anything from the world in order to save him from dying. God was the power that he believed filled and sustained him, but it was God who had made him powerless. The miracle was to be that there would be no miracle. When it came time for him to eat his last meal with his friends, he knew it was his last. He was to be spared nothing.
At this dinner betrayal was in the air. Anger surrounded this Jesus… this man of love. His 3 years of ministry was constantly filled with the bad news of religious leaders. Yet his he seemed to evade them at every corner. Burn after burn, facial after facial. Here’s a coin Jesus who should it go to (well give Caesar what is Caesar’s give god what is god’s…Burn). Here’s a fornicating woman Jesus (well you without sin cast the first stone… Burn). Finally they had an inside spy. They had him on the grounds of messing up the temple, and he claimed to be God. Finally the control is ours.
Meanwhile back at the ranch: True to form, the disciples are bickering about which of them is to be regarded as the greatest. In that very room where they had every reason to know that something fateful and tragic was about to happen to the leader they swore they loved, it is their own fate they are worried about as they set about jockeying for position. “Let the greatest among you become as the youngest, and the leader as one who serves,” Jesus says, and you can hear the weariness in his voice as he says it, wondering if it can be possible after all he has tried to show them both with his words and with his life that they have still missed the whole point of everything.
Peter is the one of them who shows some signs of understanding when he protests, “Lord, I am ready to go with you to prison and to death,” but not even him does Jesus see grounds for much hope. “Peter, the cock will not crow this day, until you three times deny that you know me,” he tells him, and you can hear the silence that settles over the table like a mist. Not only will Peter deny him, Jesus says, but one of them sitting there is going to betray him, and no sooner are the words out of his mouth that their recriminations begin. As a moment before, when they wanted to know which of them was to be the hero of the piece, now they want to know which will be the villain. We all need someone to blame we all need the villain “It is he to whom I shall give this morsel when I dipped it,” Jesus whispers, and the one who takes it from his hands and slips out into the night is Judas, the son of Simon Iscariot.
“what you are going to do,” Jesus says to Judas, “do quickly.” It was Judas who led the authorities to the garden a little way east of Jerusalem, and it was Judas who signaled to them which of the men standing there in the dark was Jesus. The way he signaled, of course, was by going up to him and kissing him, and when Dante came to write his Inferno, it was because of this kiss that he placed Judas in the nethermost circle of hell, his torment being to spend eternity in the icy lake of Cocytus while Satan, winged like a bat, gnaws at his frozen flesh.
Judas seems frozen at least in time as he leans forward with one hand on Jesus’ chest, their beards just touching. There is something tentative in the way he goes about it as if for a moment he is not sure that he has found the right man or that, having found him, he can remember what his kiss is supposed to signal. We cannot see his face very well, just part of his profile – the lines on his forehead and the corner of one eye, the curve of his cheek. It is easier to condemn a man to nethermost circle of hell when you cannot see such things too clearly.
Jesus’ eyes are closed, and he seems to be unsteady on his feet, leaning a little backward and clutching his robe. He could be Dostoevsky’s father Zossima, who said, “Fathers and teachers, I ponder, ‘what is hell?’ I maintain that hell is the suffering of being unable to love.” He has his left hand raised in benediction.
The soldiers are there with their swords and lanterns. High priest’s slave is whimpering over his wounded ear. There can be no doubt in Jesus’ mind what the kiss of Judas means, but it is Judas that he is blessing, and Judas that he is prepared to go out and die for now. Judas is only the first in a procession of betrayers two thousand years long. If Jesus were to exclude him from his love and forgiveness, to one degree or another he would have to exclude us all.
"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. This is to my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.
9 "As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.
Jesus heard the news. And he was in the real world. Surrounded by his friends who betrayed him. Their apathy hastened him to that fateful day of torture. Perhaps the very people who were laying down palm branches a week before were now yelling “Free Barabbas!” There they stood as they watched a whip take chunks out of his back. I think Jesus had every right to place blame on others. After all, he was the one with the truth. He could have blamed the dominant paradigm of the religious order for him being up there on the cross. As the centurion soldier was stabbing him in the side he might have said “damn government!” He did have the truth, all of it. And he very well could have implemented a rule book to peter saying: you must think this way. You must act this way. This is the way it works. Instead he said take up your cross and follow me.
But the words that Jesus said as he was up there in all catholic glory were: “forgive them father for they don’t know what they’re doing.” And his words were not that of belittlement, or chastisement. These were genuine words of love to a very angry people. Can you imagine being tortured, and having the wherewithal to actually distance yourself from the torture long enough to realize that this group that is killing you is not really in their right mind, then on top of that saying I forgive you as the spike is driven into your arm.
I think it is this that Jesus is talking about when we take up our cross and follow him. So many of us have focused our energy on whether we are towing the line in terms of perfection. Our cross is not Jesus’ Cross. It is blaming ourselves for our betrayals. It’s trying to control others around us so that we can “walk more in the light.” But Jesus’ Cross is not that at all. Upon the Cross Jesus loved you and you and he loved himself. Upon the cross he didn’t blame you or you, and took the weight of all sin so that you would never be blamed again. Upon the cross, he does not pull a controlling manipulative move going “look what you’ve done… are you happy now…you better be good… or else.” He says “Freely you have received, freely give.”
What a mind twist to be facing those that accuse you, all that abuse you, all that flail and kick you and others to the ground; and face them with the love of God. But Geoff… I want to teach them a lesson, I want to kick their ass, I relish in the beauty of watching them suffer before me saying “see how it feels.” Yet when you are attached to the vine, you begin to understand that “they don’t know what they’re doing.” But you begin to worry “if I don’t make a stand here, they won’t learn their lesson. And the world will be filled with more people like them” Which do you want? Joy of friendship, or for the other to know that you were right. “Geoff this is Jesus we are talking about… there is no way I can do this.” Are you sure? Paul writes: the same Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you…If you look for that strength… it is there. “So you think that I have a chance? But sometimes I like blaming others and functioning in anger and revenge”… But how do you really feel about it? The U2 song is correct that Grace travels outside of Karma. Justice and Retribution are obliterated by forgiveness. Someone that truly forgives pisses off someone who wants to fight.
The Cross that Jesus asks us to follow him with is the same one he endured. It is one of looking straight into the world that is full of hatred, malice, and general ugly. It is understanding the reality of a spike going through your forearm. It is feeling the entrapment of those that would wish to take away our freedom. But as you sit there in your painful now, squirming to find a place that is less uncomfortable begin to understand today what Jesus understood.
Now is not always.
His entire troop betrayed him. This was a very real now. The man with the Keys…Peter denied him 3 times. Yet in the imagination of God, Jesus knew who Peter was in the vine. He was a man that preached the first message at Pentecost and started this thing called the church.
His Religion Betrayed him. They conspired to put him to death. A very real now. Yet in the imagination of God, Jesus knew that this act of betrayal would be the very thing that redeemed the religion.
You see: on your very real, painful, terrible cross lies the power of the imagination of God. It seems masochistic to be up there with a smile on your face. It’s nearly as foolish as Monty Python’s life of Brian where at the end of the movie those that are getting crucified are doing their best to perform a kick line while singing “always look on the bright side of life.”
But the fact is, it is the contrast of life that ignites the spark of prayer. It is the reality of our world that causes the imagination of God to whiz within us. Praying for a better tomorrow. I’m pretty sure that Jesus wasn’t smiling up there on the cross. He was struggling not to condemn all of humanity. He was probably having a hard time not placing Judas in the 22nd rung of hell. He was probably asking what many have asked in their hard times “Father why have you forsaken me?”
Like Jesus we need to lean into the pains of our suffering, because it is within that reality that we can imagine a better tomorrow for ourselves and for others. This is why James writes “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
We can’t stay there though… We also need Jesus’ example to let God take care of it. We may need to lean into our pain when it is occurring. For our prayers wouldn’t be real if we didn’t. But when the pain is not occurring our constant attention to it is not productive. Jesus didn’t rise from the dead 3 days later and give everyone a guilt trip for killing him. “remember when you denied me peter? I’m really disappointed in you.” No…He rose from the dead saying you are free. Jesus didn’t look back and dwell in his crucifixion. When he was risen… it was done… God answered. Let God do his work while you stick to yours. Let your prayers go out when you feel the immense contrast of life, but don’t hold on to that terrible contrast. Know that God has heard your prayer and begin to enjoy the journey to your better tomorrow. Let your prayer envision your tomorrow where Peter is preaching the Gospel to 3000. Let your prayer envision your tomorrow where 3 days later the Spirit of God rose from the grave a lifeless body. Because the Spirit of him who raised Jesus is living within you. If you ask for bread you are not going to get a snake. You’re going to get bread.
Your life is not contingent on the world’s problems, your life is not contingent on others behavior, and your life is not contingent on how many gold stars you get, your life is about staying connected to your source, your God, your ever-living. Feel the life pumping though you, making the beautiful fruit come forth in your soul, the grapes of appreciation, thankfulness, enjoyment, freedom, and empowerment. The life in connection with God is about participating in joy. The moment your experience is based on someone else or something else, is the moment you have lost connection with your tap root.
Do you understand that You are loved? Do you understand that you are magnificent? Do you understand that you are so worthy of love that God has composed this life for you? Let go of your blame of others, Let go of your control of circumstance, Begin to forgive those that have betrayed you. This is life in the vine. It is life without fear that someone will hurt you. Because your prayers have already done their work of safety. It is life trusting in the control of the tap root, because it is God that knows the hearts of men and what drives them… and it is not manipulation it is Joy. Life in the vine is where your blame and anger are acknowledged and answered by the Power of God, if we simply relax and just let it in.
Sure enough when we listen to NPR or any opinionated program, we will hear bad news; we will hear blame; and we will want control. It is overwhelming because we don’t have control and that can make us feel absolutely powerless. My encouragement to you today is you do have within you the greatest of all handlers, the spirit of God. Today, Abide in Christ, take refuge in the care and love of God… Set free your prayers today for a better tomorrow and know that God has heard you and the answer is on its way. Because this is his mandate. He says: Take up your cross and Follow me.
Which means: Today, Stare into the face of this world as is, and use your God given imagination to uplift it.
