Jesus says hate your dad.

Who likes their father?
Who loves their father?
Who loves their mother?
Who loves their brother or sister?
Who loves their life?
Who loves Jesus?
Who loves Jesus so much that they will lay down their life to accomplish his purposes?

Jesus lived in a family centered society where bloodlines justified much of what people did. Justified war. Justified life in separation from those of the country-side because they weren't of the same lineage.
Your power came from your family. To see the contrast in where Jesus was teaching from, think about our society which pays tribute to family in lip service, however economics are what justifies what our society does. Economics justifies war. Justifies life in separation from those without finances. Our power and importance comes from our pocketbooks in America.

As a further understanding of where our two societies differ. If you remember the parable Jesus told about the prodigal son. To us today, many people would find offensive the concept that the prodigal son took the inheritance and squandered it. This was seen as bad back then, however what would have been seen as worse was the fact that he left his family to begin with. Why would he do such a thing? What a fool.

I make this distinction not to say how much better life was in the bible. It wasn't. Though they valued family and relationships more than we do societal, it was still so fucked up that Jesus had to yell WAKE UP. And when he did people didn't like what he had to say.

So imagine if you will you are part of a society that values beyond all things bloodline and family. The Donald trumps of this world were those whose families had cajoled and wheedled their way to the top generationally. One day Jesus is teaching in a house, and word comes through the crowd that his mother and brothers want to see him. This is priority in this society. This is family. The red sea of people would at this point part for Jesus to see Mary and his brothers. This is what is proper. And Jesus seizes the opportunity to teach where our true alliances should be: He says “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” Pointing to his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers. For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”

He is saying bloodline is insignificant compared to the loyalty he has to those that are functioning within God's kingdom. Those who are a part of what God is doing here on earth are his FAMILY. Do you realize that Jesus is using his own mom to underline his bond with someone who is having God's will be complete within them. This was not cool.
In Luke 14 there are tons of people around him, they were literally following him, traveling from this house to this house, some out of their home town.

Jesus stops and says “If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple.

Now for some of you this statement of hating your family may be good news. You're like: this is for me. You may say: Jesus this is my kind of religion. I'm already there.

Some of you who have better moms and dads may be a little offended. Why is Jesus telling me to be a hater? Is Jesus anti-family values?

But even if you had the best family in the world. You truly will not understand the bomb Jesus dropped by saying this. If you have any inkling that this could be difficult, in this society it was a crowbar to all they saw as important. A shattering of the power structure. How do I make it without my family? Hate my family?

It's father's day, so I thought I'd help everyone out today by revealing Jesus' plan for some of us to become a good fathers. Simply said, he taught us: to be a good dad, we need to hate our dad. I guess it works to become a good mom as well. We have to hate our mom. To become good, we have to hate our family.

What are the power structures in this world that are more important than becoming a child of the light? Where has retaliation taken the place of forgiveness? Where has business taken the place of compassion? Where has your needs taken the place of putting others before you?

To become a good dad we need to put to death our need to gain power over others. To be a good dad we need to hate those things that are in our life that arbitrarily mean that we are more powerful. To be a good dad we need to take a path of singularity where we are becoming good people.
Jesus had a very simple way to articulate the complexity of how you become a good dad. He said "Follow me."
Happy father's day.

Put that around your neck and wear it

C: I’m a gift giver. My love language is “gifts”. I love giving gifts and I love getting them…when they are thoughtful. If you aren’t going to be thoughtful, just give me the five dollars or whatever and let me go shopping. Seriously. It REALLY IS the thought that counts with me. There have been times over the course of my life where I have been randomly prompted to give a gift to someone…this happened recently and I asked the person in this story for their permission to tell it.

About a month ago, I visited an art blog that I frequent and saw a photograph of a locket from an etsy site. I immediately clicked on the photo, was taken to the etsy page and quickly purchased the locket for my friend, Angie. Inside the locket it says, “I am enough”. It was one of those moments where I didn’t even have to think about it. It was automatic, “Angie needs this necklace.” I didn’t discuss purchasing it with Geoff, I just purchased it. A week went by and no necklace…then two weeks….I began to wonder if the meaning of the message would no longer be of importance to my friend. “Was I really prompted to make that purchase?” “Has too much time lapsed and now it won’t be received with meaning?” These are all things my crazy gift giving mind goes through when purchasing a gift, any gift, for someone. I want it to be the right one, at just the right time, with just the right meaning for the person. Three weeks had passed and finally the necklace arrived. I decided I had indeed purchased the necklace for Angie and so it was definitely hers and I was just the messenger who got to take part in delivering her gift. I approached Angie at church and gave her the necklace. She immediately put it on and said, “You have no idea how much I needed this, this week.” I recently (for the purpose of this message) asked Angie why the necklace meant so much to her. She responded via text, “When u have something that causes u to doubt yourself or always feel u should be further along than u are. Then out of the blue someone who loves u listens to God and God tells u through them YOU ARE ENOUGH! U start to believe it’s true. This happened to me when Crystal gave me a locket that said You Are Enough….I start to believe it and when I doubt I open the locket.”

Two weeks later, for my birthday, my parents purchased a locket for me (via my sister, Sherri) from the exact same etsy site. Mine says, “Hope lives here”. I so needed to be reminded of that in that instant. I was brought to tears in front of my family because my closest people saw that Hope Lived HERE. I needed that. With all the failures I have had in my life that haunt me, I need to be reminded of the hope that lives in me….My parents and my sister did that for me.


G: We have been listening to the audio book, “I’m Proud of You: My Friendship with Mr. Rogers” by Tim Madigan. It’s a book that highlights the correspondences between Fred and Tim throughout their life. We have been literally sobbing through the entire thing.. Specifically whenever Mister Rogers pens a letter. In the book, Tim writes about his impending divorce and because of his deep friendship with Mr. Rogers, he is apprehensive to tell his friend the news, more so, than even telling his children. He writes:
And on that sunny December afternoon in 1997, I was sure I had finally found something I could say or do that would finally render Mister Rogers incapable of unconditional regard. He was a man who had devoted his life to children and their families, and I was a man about to destroy his own. ... I finally summoned my nerve, went inside to our computer, and typed out a letter to my friend, tears of remorse streaming down my cheeks. After years of counseling and struggle, my marriage was probably ending and I was the one ending it, I told Mister Rogers in my letter that day. Could he forgive such a person? Could he continue to love such a man?

His reply arrived within the week, dated December 20, 1997, two full pages on the stationery of Mister Rogers' Neighborhood, written in Fred's pinched, meticulous, highly distinctive hand. I did not make it through the first paragraph before I again began to cry.

My dear Tim,
Bless your heart. I feel so for you—for you all—but, Tim, please know that I would never forsake you, that I will never be disappointed with you, that I would never stop loving you. How I wish we could be closer geographically! I'd get in my car, drive to your house, knock on your door, and, when you answered I'd hug you tight.
You are a beautiful man, inside and out, and those who care about you are privileged to share your pain...As for suffering: I believe that there are fewer people than ever who escape major suffering in this life. In fact I'm fairly convinced that the Kingdom of God is for the broken-hearted. You write of "powerlessness." Join the club; we are not in control: God is.
Our trust and affection run very deep. You know you are in my prayers-now and always. If you ever need me you have only to call and I would do my best to get to you, or you to me...
...You are my beloved brother, Tim. You are God's beloved son.

The weight of our own imperfections can be so devastating. Tim had quite an advantage to have a friend that would know everything about him. Yet still value him in midst of his imperfections. The truth of our inadequacy has quite a weight, but when someone sticks close despite our failure. Somehow that weight lifts. Or it is at least easier to manage.

Jesus talked to people who were tired of the weight they were carrying. He said in Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. “Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and YOU WILL FIND REST FOR YOUR SOULS. “For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”

The yoke is a necklace an ox wears for plowing. And when a new ox is learning how to “wear this yoke” they pair him up with a more experienced ox. Jesus is saying that you can share this burden that you have with him, and he will show you how to manage it. There is a relationship here... a teaching here. And just like Fred Rogers to Tim Madigan, the promise of someone being there to lighten your load.


C: What we would like you to do, is take about 2-3 minutes to close your eyes and think about a time when someone, genuinely prompted by God gave you a truth that lightened what you had been carrying around your neck. Please post your stories below if you wish.


I have a failed marriage under my belt, failed friendships, failed integrity, failed attitude, failed sisterhood, failed work ethic….the list goes on…and on, quite frankly. Those of you that know me well, know my story of literally spending about three months on the couch, ring less, jobless, penniless, directionless and for the lack of a better word, broken hearted about all of it. During those three months I conversed (aka yelled like a baby) with God about my devastation. Thankfully, in the midst of that, I had beautiful friends who did not give up on me, but embraced me, in all my disgruntled stupidity and are STILL friends with me to this day, which is a true gift of which I am eternally grateful. After about three months God said, “I love you.” Which I thought was complete B.S. And He reminded me again, “I love you.” In that moment, I realized I AM LOVED. WE ARE LOVED. Once I began functioning out of love instead of shame, guilt and fear, it changed the myopic lens at which I saw not only myself, but others as well...and God. The love we receive (from God) usurps the broken heartedness we experience. It doesn’t magically take it away; it usurps it.


G: Over the pillared halls of many knowledge institutions the statement "the truth will set you free" is chiseled for all to reflect on. Its not the entire verse... the entire verse can be found in John 8:31-32 it says:


To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”


There is a little bit of contingency there. The truth is not absent of relationship. It is only in the context of learning with Him to be like Him that we can become persons increasingly capable of handling the truth. The truth has a vulnerability about it. It has a nakedness about it. And when we stand ALONE in that brokenness and vulnerability, many times we simply interpret it into something we need to hide. Or we go the opposite, and it becomes US. We ARE the perfect couple, or we ARE the major fuckup.

Jesus is saying, “Be with Me and Learn from Me, and I will show you not only how to become someone who can weather the broken heartedness that comes with knowing who you are. But better than that, I will show you who you really are.”


THAT is the truth that sets us free.


C: Once again, I’d like you to close your eyes for a moment. Only this time, I would like you to picture yourself with your head down. Picture what is weighing you down. A dear and trusted friend is approaching you. They embrace you and whisper a truth to you. What is it? What do you hear? What do you feel? What do you see? What do you smell? What do you know?


My dad recently gave me a buckeye that my grandfather, his father, carried around with him for luck. Apparently a buckeye is a symbol of luck – it kind of looks like a petrified turd, but it’s a buckeye. All you Southerners know what I’m talking about. The thing is, neither my dad nor I really believe in luck, but we do believe in the connectedness that symbols bring to us. When I carry this buckeye around in my pocket, I feel connected to my dad.

We have our own “buckeyes” here (small, round pieces of wood). What we would like you to do is write down what you envisioned your dear friend telling you that lightened what you had been carrying around your neck, on these discs. These are to help you feel connected and remind you that the truth of God’s love usurps the broken heartedness we experience. Small tokens to remember and feel connected.

The Heart of the beginning.

It was the beginning. A man went to work with his brother. He worked nights because that was when nature was most on his side. Tonight it wasn’t on his side. He would go home to his wife empty handed. Their relationship was good, but spending a whole night and not having anything to show for it always was hard. They had to take care of bills, they had to take care of the boat payment. He knew it was going to be a fight. And she knew how to cuss even better than him. And he was a sailor. A fisherman really. Maybe this was the reason he hadn’t gone home yet. As his boat was approaching the shore from that terrible night, people seemed to be up early. A local celebrity seemed to be in town and the crowd was thronging. Pushing this guy closer and closer towards the water Simon and Andrew’s boat was to be docking right where this crowd was most crazy. As they approached the craziness, they began washing out their empty nets.

Jesus climbed into Simon’s boat and continued to teach people about a reality where people are very safe within a heavenly father’s rule. However awkward the situation of a strange celebrity entering YOUR space was, it at least prolonged Simon going home to fight with his wife about being a failed fisherman. Plus it was cool to hear what this guy had to say close up. After Jesus had finished, he told Simon and Andrew to push out a little ways. Simon knew that it was the only way this guy Jesus was going to get some peace as there were about a hundred people on the lakeside shore and they weren’t going away anytime soon. As they pushed out, Simon felt the peace that he enjoyed about the water, that he learned from his dad. Jesus directed them to go further out and told them to put down their nets. Reluctantly, and emphatically informing Jesus of their terrible luck last night, they threw out thier net. Suddenly the net began getting heavier and heavier. As they began pulling it up they had to ask Jesus and a couple other boats to help them it was so heavy. There was so much fish!

Recalling what this celebrity was saying earlier, Simon got scared. He told the figure with dread “Get away from me, for I am a sinful man.”

This was the beginning. Many think this comment is a normal response of anyone who is in the presence of holiness. And it could be just like Isaiah’s revelation of the throne. But on a second look, the reverential response of awe to this divine power for peter seems more like a superstitious dread of the supernatural stemming from a slavish fear of God. The response of someone who doesn’t know the Father of Jesus. Powerfully impressed with the superhuman knowledge revealed in connection with the great catch they just received, he regards Jesus as a supernatural being, is this zeus? Is this the crackin? And he dreads Jesus as one whom it is not safe to be near, especially a poor and sinful mortal as himself. He remembers "I was about to have a screaming match with my wife. I was going to go to the local bar so that dealing with zero fish could be more bearable at 10 am." This was Peter’s beginning, no knowledge of a Gospel which magnifies the grace of God. His piety, sufficiently strong and decided, is not of Christian type yet, it is legal, one might almost say pagan in essence


It was the beginning. A man just had finished praying under a tree. His local rabbi said that might be a good thing to do. The fresh air and the piety would be a good way to spend his time. He was an active member in his synagogue, but he always felt he would never measure up to some of the people that were there. One of his friends that attended was a little more enthusiastic then he was, so when he arrived on the scene Nathanael judged what he had to say accordingly. “Nathan I have found the Messiah! It‘s Jesus of Nazareth” This wasn’t a usual thing for Phil to say, yet whenever someone comes to you with an answer for the political injustice of your entire country, and that answer comes from a no-name town in eastern Oregon, you might say what Nate said which was: “can anything good come from Nazareth?”

There was sufficient amount of prejudice of Galilee coming from the more metropolitan areas to have this come from a prideful Judean mouth. Yet Nathan was from Galilee, and as much an object of Jewish contempt as were the Nazarenes. His inward thought was, “ Surely the messiah can never come from among a poor a despised people such as we are… from Nazareth or any other Galilean town or village.

It was the beginning. And he allowed his mind to be biased by a current opinion originating in feelings with which he had no sympathy; a fault common to men whose piety, though pure and sincere, defers too much to human authority, and who thus become the slaves of sentiments utterly unworthy of them. He said this because Nathanael really thought that greatness is not available in and around his vicinity. Though skeptical, he approached a Nazarene who told him that he saw him praying under the figtree.

It was the beginning. And a man resided in Capernaum. He absolutely knew who Jesus was. No man could live in that town without hearing the “mighty works” done in and around it. Heaven had been opened right above Capernaum. Lepers were cleansed, demoniacs dispossessed; blind men received sight, and palsied men received the use of their limbs. The daughter of a distinguished citizen was re-animated into one of the living again. Yes “His fame went abroad into all the land.” Everyone wondered and talked about the various miracles that were abroad, but for Levi there was something more that made him want change. Who knows what he had to turn from. Extortion, fraud, shaking down half the land. Breaking a couple kneecaps. Or maybe he was the “nice” tax collector, and repenting for him was simply retiring. Regardless, if he was greedy… he no longer wanted to be. If he oppressed the poor, he now began to abhor the concept. It was the beginning and he wished to follow someone who was taking burdens off of people rather than putting them on.

It was the beginning, and a dangerous man entered the ranks of the followers of Jesus. There were some publicists that would have frowned on the acceptance of Levi. But at least he was someone who was for the current parties in power. This man wasn’t. This man might bring political suspicion to the Cause of Jesus. Yet Simon the Zealot was called and accepted. And what a potential for bloodshed within the bunks of the 12. The tax-gatherer and the tax-hater. The unpatriotic Jew who degraded himself by becoming a servant of the alien rule; and the Jewish patriot, who revolted under the foreign yoke. Not an accident, but a prophesy of the future.

Our New year gives us cause to ask what are WE at the beginning of. I want to go a step beyond losing weight, drinking less, or whatever and ask us what is beginning in our heart today. What is it inside you that is beginning.

Maybe there is nothing that is beginning in you. Or worse maybe you look at the survey of people that I exposed before you and you see fools. You see a man who doesn’t know who God really is, or you see a man who doesn’t have any self esteem, or you see a man that just made poor decisions in his life, or someone who has sold out. The beginnings of this heart of judgement is one that will be the same next year… maybe your beginning is to be more able to see things that are wrong with others.

But I bring these guys up because we don’t usually look at their beginnings, we look at their accomplishments, their “Sainthood” their ability to be SPIRITUAL in the RIGHT way. But they had a beginning too. And if you look at Peter, Nathanael, Matthew, or Simon the Zealot, you will see their embarrassing (or maybe not so embarrassing) beginning. But I want to highlight that at each of these beginnings was a humble heart that actually wanted answers.

Peter and Andrew DID want Jesus to show how they might be fishers of men, Nathanael DID want Christ to teach him to really pray to a living God, Matthew wanted his life to be the way of lifting burdons, and Simon wanted to live in the Kingdom of the true Israel. They all wanted a life that was different than what they had. Their heart was ready for Jesus to change the course of who they were. What does your heart want to begin? Is there a call?

Is there something in you that is beginning to be an enthusiast? Like James and John maybe your heart’s beginning to heat up, and, as an unbelieving world would say, your heart is turned by a dream about a divine kingdom to be set up here on earth, with Jesus for its king. My encouragement today is to let that dream possessed you, and rule your mind like it has for others beginnings before you. This vision of a life on earth as it is in in heaven will shape your beginning and compel your destiny, like Abraham, today, I encourage you to let your humble beginning start. Leave your country and go forth on what might be a very humble prayer that asks Jesus “I want to follow you… I will follow you… How do I do it?”

This will not be on a Bookmark

When I first became a Christian, life was magical. I woke up listening to Christian radio. My prayer time in the morning was as real and pleasant as sunshine in my room. There was an instance in my early conversion where I actually witnessed color differently. It was like I was seeing brighter. More beautiful colors. I wasn’t high. But I was on something.

I drank in sermons from everywhere because I was so thirsty. Enrolled in Bible college. Fought with my dad on how I needed to stay at bible college, instead of staying with my university education. I had extreme devotion to Jesus.

At this point I probably didn’t read this passage in Hebrews 12
7 Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? [...] 10 Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. 11 No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
Hebrews 12:7, 10-11 (NIV)

I’m pretty sure I didn’t read this at the time, or if I did I would not have understood the gravity of what it talks about. Because I’m sure at the time a prayer that would have gone up would be. YEAH GOD DISCIPLINE ME. And it would have been a genuine prayer. And God may and did grant it. But it sounds a little S&Mee

These early experiences of color, teaching, devotion, and crazy prayers, moved me down a path where I decided to follow Jesus. And three years later I found myself talking to a friend on the side of the road crying. I was explaining to him how all of these magical experiences had dried up. If I was still seeing colors differently, I didn’t remember how I used to see them. I was knee deep in my studies, but none of it was feeding my soul. And I told this person that I simply felt that God wasn’t near me any more.

As people who inhabit time, we live our life in undulation. This means that while our spirit can be directed toward an eternal object, our bodies, passions, and imaginations are in continual change, for to be in time means to change. As a result our nearest approach to constancy, is undulation—the repeated return to a level from which we repeatedly fall back, a series of troughs and peaks.

When I was crying on the side of the road, I just thought I did something wrong. Maybe I wasn’t praying hard enough or I wasn’t worshiping long enough. Little did I know that this removal from God’s presence, from his magical world. Was God’s very point. It was him giving me freedom. This Trough, this discipline of living life without “EXTREME COLOR” was letting me freely become his son. Many times when we experience hardship, all we can see is the pain.

But sometimes we have to see things from another perspective. CS LEWIS had a gift for articulating God from other perspectives. This is a snippet from a letter written by Uncle Screwtape in the “screwtape letters,” his perspective is one of an undersecretary to the devil, and he is writing to his nephew Wormwood, who just graduated and has his first project. A Human host. We don’t have much context, but in this scenario Wormwood Is trying to teach why as a devil, they need to not coast during the troughs of someone’s life

The Enemy [GOD] allows this disappointment to occur on the threshold of every human endeavour. It occurs when the boy who has been enchanted in the nursery by Stories from the Odyssey buckles down to really learning Greek. It occurs when lovers have got married and begin the real task of learning to live together. In every department of life it marks the transition from dreaming aspiration to laborious doing. The Enemy takes this risk because He has a curious fantasy of making all these disgusting little human vermin into what He calls His "free" lovers and servants—"sons" is the word He uses, with His inveterate love of degrading the whole spiritual world by unnatural liaisons with the two-legged animals. Desiring their freedom, He therefore refuses to carry them, by their mere affections and habits, to any of the goals which He sets before them: He leaves them to "do it on their own". And there lies our opportunity. But also, remember, there lies our danger. If once they get through this initial dryness successfully, they become much less dependent on emotion and therefore much harder to tempt.

…You must have often wondered why the Enemy does not make more use of His power to be sensibly present to human souls in any degree He chooses and at any moment. But you now see that the Irresistible and the Indisputable are the two weapons which the very nature of His scheme forbids Him to use. Merely to over-ride a human will (as His felt presence in any but the faintest and most mitigated degree would certainly do) would be for Him useless. He cannot ravish. He can only woo. For His ignoble idea is to eat the cake and have it; the creatures are to be one with Him, but yet themselves; merely to cancel them, or assimilate them, will not serve. He is prepared to do a little overriding at the beginning. He will set them off with communications of His presence which, though faint, seem great to them, with emotional sweetness, and easy conquest over temptation. But He never allows this state of affairs to last long. Sooner or later He withdraws, if not in fact, at least from their conscious experience, all those supports and incentives. He leaves the creature to stand up on its own legs—to carry out from the will alone duties which have lost all relish. It is during such trough periods, much more than during the peak periods, that it is growing into the sort of creature He wants it to be. Hence the prayers offered in the state of dryness are those which please Him best. We can drag our patients along by continual tempting, because we design them only for the table, and the more their will is interfered with the better. He cannot "tempt" to virtue as we do to vice. He wants them to learn to walk and must therefore take away His hand; and if only the will to walk is really there He is pleased even with their stumbles.

…Do not be deceived, Wormwood. Our cause is never more in danger, than when a human, no longer desiring, but intending, to do our Enemy's will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of Him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys.

Have you ever seen the bookmark or fine piece of Christian artwork entitled Footprints? Its about a guy dying, seeing his life as a beach. He was walking with Jesus and both of them were making footprints in the sand. When he looked back during the hard times of his life he noticed that there was only one set of footprints. When he inquired to Jesus why he left him during those times, Jesus replied. I didn’t leave you alone… I was carrying you.

I think it is funny that according to Screwtape, it is God’s plan to allow us to walk on our own. It is the way we can freely become his “child” without God’s intervention. To live faithfully through the difficulty of life.

We live our life in undulation our hardship can easily be seen as that… hardship. but if we look at it in light of eternity, these troughs of hardship in which God seems absent, our cries, our prayers, our confusion is far from non-devotion. because it is these cries and stances that allow us to freely stand on our 2 feet. Housing the character of God within us. This stance without the support of our senses seeing God in Dazzling Color, is what God calls true devotion.

Anger Videos

Zippy and Friends

After re-entering children's television with Bettylou, I was take by the cleverness of Yo Gabba Gabba. How they would teach you to brush your teeth with songs that would burrow into your skull. As I realized this was an amazing teaching method, I also realized the untapped potential in utilizing this method to deal with one of the more fundimental of human evils... Anger. Here is my attempt at exploring it with the help of some amazing friends.

Zippy: Hey Everybody, I’m in a Kids TV show.
What’s that? It’s a BEE.
Spelled with the letter B. Let’s see what he’s buzzing about. Hi BEE
Bee: I’m so pissed off!
Zippy: What?
Bee: Oooooooooooooh!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so angry!! Ooooooooooooh!
Zippy: What’s going on!?!
Bee: Ooooooooh! Oooooh!!!! Eeeeeerrrrrrrrggggghhhhhhh!
Zippy: What the!!?!
Bee: I feel like I want to punch something! Or someone! EEEEEEERRRRRGH! My blood is boiling and I can’t! I can’t! I can’t fucking breathe!!! My friend said something to me and so I yelled at him and I hate him and I also keyed his car!
Zippy: Hey Bee calm down. When did this happen?
Bee: (throwing things, shoving things) THREE WEEKS AGO! I HATE HIM! Don’t talk to Knuckles anymore. He’s a loser, a freak and he doesn’t know what the hell he’s talking about!
Zippy: When was the last time you talked to Knuckles?
Bee: THREE WEEKS AGO!
Zippy: Three weeks ago? That’s quite awhile…what did he say to you to make you so angry still?
Bee: He said Clyde Shooter my favorite Basketball player on “the Hornets” was a klutz. I KNOW I’m going to find him and STING HIM in the damn face! Sting him in the face! Sting him in the face! Sting him in the face!
Zippy: Whoa. Do you realize, if you sting him, he could have an allergic reaction and die or at the very least have a scar?
Bee: I hope he gets a scar! A scar on his damn face!
Zippy: Do you realize if YOU sting him, you will die?
Bee: I DON’T CA – wait, what? What?
Zippy: You’re a bee. If you sting someone, you die right after. Why don’t you just call and talk to Knuckles and sort it out? I’m sure he didn’t mean to hurt you.
Bee: (running around in circles) AAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
Zippy: Bee, calm down. Seriously, you’re going to hurt yourself, or someone else. Listen to me, Bee. Don’t Bee Angry, Bee Constructive, Bee Calm. Look, anger isn’t a bad thing, it’s like when you get a side ache, you know something is wrong with you physically, right?
Bee: Yeah?
Zippy: Well, anger is the same way. It can tell you when something is wrong socially. When someone has done or said something that is morally wrong against you. It’s ok to be angry, but it’s been three weeks. That’s probably too long. Have you done anything constructive by being this mad?
Bee: I cleaned my hive top to bottom seven times in one day and I keyed Knuckles’ car and I told a bunch of people about how pissed I am and they all agree I should be mad at him!
Zippy: Ok, but where has that gotten you? You haven’t pollinated any flowers, you haven’t brought back any sweet honey to your hive and your friends are getting tired of hearing the same story about how mad you are without you taking any positive action. Also if Knuckles finds out that you keyed his car. You might get in trouble. If you let this continue to build, you’re going to end up being jumpy and mad, running from trouble and eventually end up stinging someone, hurting them and dieing yourself.
It Sounds like our friends are going to teach us a way to de-escalate our anger… By counting to TEN.

SONG - Count to Ten
[Break - what I do when I’m angry? #1]
Zippy: Hey Knuckles!
Moose: Hi Zippy.
Zippy: Why the long face?
Moose: haha. Very funny.
Zippy: haha…But seriously, Knuckles, you don’t quite seem like yourself today. What’s up?
Moose: It’s that Fucking asshole!
Zippy: What in the world? Who are you talking about!
Moose: This fucking asshole slipped in one of my pies.
Zippy: I love pie! But he slipped on one?
Moose: No my moose pies, ya know… Dooty. Anyway he fell and hurt his ankle. Now he’s suing me! If he would have been looking where he was going, he wouldn’t have stepped in my dooty and fallen like the klutz he is! He is such a fucking asshole!
Zippy: Whoa, Knuckles, LANGUAGE!
Moose: I know, I know, Zippy, but he IS a fucking asshole! He’s suing me for something so stupid! Yes, he stepped in MY dooty and hurt his ankle, but it’s not my fault! Now I have to get a lawyer and then possibly have to pay out the ass to this douche bag just because he wasn’t looking where he was going.
Zippy: Wow, Knuckles. Do you really think the guy is a fucking asshole?
Moose: Yes!
Zippy: Really? Do you know him?
Moose: Yes. He’s my neighbor, he lives in that basketball over there, and we’ve had some BBQ’s over the years together. But this…this just sealed the deal. I knew something was fishy with him when he paved part of my forest for a basketball court, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it until now.


Zippy: Wait, isn’t this the same neighbor that helped you and Mrs. Knuckles build your deck and the same neighbor that gave you money toward your mission trip to Alaska?
Moose: Yes. But he’s turned into a money sucking hound!
Zippy: Have you talked to him about this?
Moose: No….After he fell I just laughed, because he had my poop on his jeans and he yelled at me, so I just walked off.
Zippy: Wow, Knuckles, so you just left him there in your poop and didn’t check to see if he was ok? You didn’t try to help him? I have a hard time believing your neighbor is a money sucking hound or an asshole or a douche bag – you’re the one rejecting him and that’s pretty devastating. He has done a lot of things for you … kind things for you. Do you think maybe if you called him up to check on him, you could figure something out outside of court?
Moose: Hmmm….I don’t know.
Zippy: Is he really an asshole?
Moose: No, he’s Clyde.

Song - When you call me a Jerk I’m no longer a person
[Break - what I do when I’m angry? #2]
Bee: STING HIM IN THE FACE! STING HIM IN THE FACE! STING HIM IN THE FACE!
Zippy: Whoa Bee! What’s going on!
Bee: I found out it was because of HIM that my favorite center from the Hornets has been out of commission the past couple games. STING HIM IN THE FACE! STING HIM IN THE FACE!
Zippy: Hold on!
Bee: OOOOOOOOH
Zippy: I know you are angry, and you have every justification in the world to sting knuckles in the face. But I saw something recently that might make you change your mind.
Bee: No Way
Zippy: Hold on behind this tree, and listen to our conversation before you do any face stinging. OK?
Moose: Hey Zippy
Zippy: Hey Knuckles why the long face?
Moose: Ha Ha Oh man that never gets old
Zippy: Ha Ha I know. You look better though.
Moose: Yeah I reconsidered that my neighbor wasn’t a fucking asshole after all. Clyde is a Basketball Player and so when he slipped on my moose pie…
Zippy: mmm I love pie
Moose: ha …when he slipped on my dooty and hurt his ankle he thought his season was over. I went over to his house and told him I was sorry for laughing at him. And that if I could give him some money for his medical bills I really want to make it up to him. Apparently that was all he needed. His ankle had healed well over the last 3 weeks, and he didn’t see any reason to keep a lawsuit against me being neighbors and all.
Reconciliation does feel better than the contempt I was feeling for Clyde.
Hey you know? Come to think about it? I haven’t talked to my friend BEE in about three weeks… since Clyde’s accident. That’s not like us. I should see if everything is OK.

Zippy: Hey Bee! Did you hear all of that.
Bee: Yeah…
Moose: Bee is everything OK?
Bee: I’m mad at you for calling my favorite player a klutz. I know it was because he slipped on your poop. I was going to get revenge when zippy asked me to listen behind that tree. I see that you patched it up Clyde, but I still am so angry.
Moose: I’m sorry Bee. What can I do to make it right.
Bee: I don’t know.
Zippy: Hey Bee, you know one thing that you can be proud of yourself about is that you still could hear me. Your anger didn’t control you. That you were willing to put your revenge aside long enough to hear what knuckles was saying. If our focus is in the right place, when we get angry but we will still keep our integrity. The anger doesn’t rule us, we can use it as a positive gage to know when something is wrong socially, instead of over-reacting or cutting off relationship from others.
Bee: I just wish I could NOT be angry. Zippy: That’s the hard thing about anger though. Its not something you can really shut off. Anger is something that comes from your heart. You can’t just stop it… it’s a part of who you are. When we indulge in it for 3 weeks it doesn’t just go away in a second. And usually it gathers its brothers contempt and malice and justifies revenge.

I know you want to DO the right thing and not be intensely angry at your brother. But because anger comes from your heart. You have to BECOME that kind of person that would naturally give the benefit of the doubt. Plus… You’re not a DO you’re a BEE. When you are someone who isn’t angry it is easy to not be angry.

Bee: Well How do I BEE someone who isn’t angry?
Zippy: When that question gets a hold of you, and you really are interested in answering it. What you can DO is trust God to walk you through the steps is takes to BEE someone who isn’t angry. God is the one that changes hearts.

Don’t be a do be a bee
Be the kind of person that would naturally do

Reconciliation Only comes from the heart
it’s not something that you do it is something that we are.



[What do I do when I get angry] #3 Zippy: Well guys its almost time to go
EVERYONE: OHHHH
Zippy: but first lets remember what we learned today.
We learned that We can de-escalate our anger by counting to ten
We learned that calling someone names really shows us that we have contempt for them, and it is blinding us in giving them the benefit of the doubt
And we learned that in order to be the kind of person that isn’t angry we have to become that kind of person in our heart first.

LETS DANCE IT OUT

BYE EVERYBODY!

Death Cleaned Up

We have cleaned up death. You go into the meat department you don’t see carcusses of animals. You see nicely wrapped steaks. Hospitals ease the pain associated with death. Hospice care is our way of easing the workload that it takes to die. Funeral homes are spotless as they incinerate or embalm death. None of this is bad. It’s great to have no flies, or pain, or difficulty, or smell when it comes to dead things. It just makes the story of the cross a little more distant. It’s primative from our clean world. How can you look at the execution and murder of someone in such a disgusting brutal way, when we live in a society that kills its criminals with a painless liquid? It’s embarrassing to come to terms with it. The center of our faith, our omnipotent God, crucified. That’s messy! The cross stands in the middle of history as an embarrassing, vulger symbol that flagrantly rubs against our pride. Religion we think should be nice, religion should be love. Yet here we have a terrible vision of anguish nailed in the middle of our clean nice loving faith.

To some, they aren’t ready to go there… not ready to get their hands dirty. But for others they can’t profess that the purell world is really what they see. And they cry out for someone to answer what they actually do see. They see people claiming love, and not living it. They see war. They see abuse around them. They see clearly that there is a problem. And it is for those who see that Christ did what he did. Nailed here in our world because it is dirty down here. We pursue things that slime the world we live in, and we areselves are slimed by others. We cry out and find a way to get them back. And we do. Will it stop? The cross stands in the soul of a person poised for retaliation and demands forgiveness. The cross takes the tightened fist against his brother and turns the other cheek. The cross is dirty, because it deals with the dirt of our lives. It puts to death our pretention. It gives us humility. After a heavy contemplation of the cross you will find the burden of sin has fallen off and rolled into the grave where it belongs.

(from the Pilgrim's Progress)

Now I saw in my dream, that the highway up which Christian was to go, was fenced on either side with a wall, and that wall was called Salvation. Up this way, therefore, did burdened Christian run, but not without great difficulty, because of the load on his back.

He ran thus till he came at a place somewhat ascending, and upon that place stood a cross, and a little below, in the bottom, a grave. So I saw in my dream, that just as Christian came up with the cross, his burden loosed from off his shoulders, and fell from off his back, and began to tumble, and so continued to do, till it came to the mouth of the grave, where it fell in, and I saw it no more.

Then was Christian glad and lightsome, and said, with a merry heart, "He has given me rest by his sorrow, and life by his death." Then he stood still awhile to look and wonder; for it was very surprising to him, that the sight of the cross should thus ease him of his burden. He looked therefore, and looked again, even till the springs that were in his head sent the waters down his cheeks. Now, as he stood looking and weeping, behold three Shining Ones came to him and saluted him with "Peace be unto you". So the first said to him, "Your sins are forgiven"; the second stripped him of his rags, and clothed him with change of raiment; the third also set a mark on his forehead, and gave him a roll with a seal upon it, which he encouraged him to look at as he ran, and that he should give it in at the Celestial Gate. So they went their way.

"Who's this? the Pilgrim. How! 'tis very true,
Old things are past away, all's become new.
Strange! he's another man, upon my word,
They be fine feathers that make a fine bird.

Then Christian gave three leaps for joy, and went on singing--
"Thus far I did come laden with my sin;
Nor could aught ease the grief that I was in
Till I came hither: What a place is this!
Must here be the beginning of my bliss?
Must here the burden fall from off my back?
Must here the strings that bound it to me crack?
Blest cross! blest grave! blest rather be
The Man that there was put to shame for me!"

I have a dirty project for you.
I would like us to look at the elements in our life that are embarrassing, prideful, ugly, maybe simply been evil for the sake of self preservation. Essentially, if you can, use this time to reflect on the burden of sin that you are carrying.
Then I’d like you to spend some time seeing that the cross is to there to free you from that burden.
Finally, if you find it appropriate, Please write your burden on a piece of paper… get your hands dirty and bury it.

is heaven boring?

It’s around that time of year that we pick up the bible and remember some pretty crazy things. My parents relayed a story about my sister’s household that underlines the difficulty of the Christian story.
K: “mommy I want to go see the baby Jesus.”
E: “Um who told you about the baby Jesus?”
K: “Johnny did at school. I didn’t know about the baby Jesus, but I can’t wait to see him. Can we go see him?”
E: “We can’t go see the baby Jesus.”
K: “What? Why not?”
E: “Because the baby Jesus is dead.”
K: “how did he die?”
E: “Some people killed him.”
K: “How did they kill him?”
My mom heard this conversation from my sister, and promptly told her that she needs to bring Katy to Sunday school so that she doesn’t get into these sort of pickles.

Many of us just relax into the season, letting the pickle melt away into presents, stress, and glowing little children on the lawn. As I was reading the Christmas story last week, instead of focusing on the virgin or the birth or the baby, I brought my eyes to the torn piece of air in which the angels peered through. Apparently to the shepherds it was something that might make you crap your pants. According to a psychological survey of most religions and people without religion… most everyone believes that they will go to heaven when they die. And most people have some sort of idea of what heaven is like. But in light of the inquisitive nature of my niece, what if we were to look at some of the scriptures about heaven and ask some questions.

Why is heaven so scary to the Shepherds? Why are the Harold Angels so excited?
In Isaiah What is the whole deal with coals in heaven? What’s with the holy chant?
In Revelation what’s with the crown tossing? Why in heaven is there this constant chant of praise?

After looking at the various heavenly passages I asked myself, if you could complain about heaven, what would you complain about? I polled my church, and some people felt like it might be too bright. Or the gold would be too slippery on wet days. Another chief complaint that caused us all to not think so jocosely was that someone would miss their family… Ouch. On a lighter note, I found with the above heavenly passages, a major theme is that of incessant praise. When the herald angels rip open the air you hear praise in the highest. When Isaiah sees the lord in his temple, he hears praise. Which makes me wonder after about a week of constant praise, if some get a little bored. So my question is:

Is Heaven Boring?

Because in heaven apparently I’ll I do is praise! And to some this seems weird. Religious people end their sentences with praise God. Praise God. They seem to place it in inopportune moments during your conversation. Praise God. Like a tick. Praise God. Personally I’m not a huge fan of those that need constant reassurance of my approval. Praise God. I’m not a huge fan of dictators that demand my loyalty. Nor do I have much respect for those that crowd around them. Praise God. That suck up to the millionaire. That sit close to the celebrity. Yet from his mouth we read in the psalms “Whoever offers me thanks and praise, he honors me.” Like he is saying ‘What I want most is to be told that I am good and great.’

It’s almost like in this context God craves, our worship like a vain woman wanting compliments, or a vain author presenting their book to people who have no idea who they are, or a vain preacher that wants to be told that their message changed someone’s life. Praise God.

In the bible it seems there is an excessive amount of praise going out from his people. And not only that urging us to praise him. Or perhaps being commanded and demanded to praise him. And it makes one think that heaven might get a little tiresome.

What about Golf? Or the ducks that you are tethered to? No … in the bible we just keep seeing praise. And the urging and surging of more praise.

It might make someone say If that’s all you do… that’s boring… I’ll take my six-pack and you can join me in hell. Because hell has sex, and cupcakes (a lot of them), and my six-pack of beer. And it’s free from all of this out of control praise.

Little Shop

In the musical little shop of horrors, we meet a nice boy named Seymour, and he is in love with Audrey. He meets up with an alien plant is carnivorous. He begins nursing the plant to health with his own blood. Soon the plant grows and needs more blood, and the only thing that can satisfy it is murder.

There is a point in the play where Seymour can’t do it anymore. The murderous lifestyle that the plant has demanded is too much so he comes to a crossroads and says “NO MORE.” But then he remembers his love of his girlfriend, who is with him now because of various plots the plant has developed, one being her ex-boyfriend was dinner. He thinks her love is based on the plant, and so he unwillingly begins killing again.

It is his praise of the thing he loves that turns him, and justifies him feeding his famous plant. This is a great example of Jesus’ Truth that says: “where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Unbenounced to Seymour, Audrey loved him prior to his fame. Prior to his plant. Yet the tragedy was that he felt her love was contingent on his status. And his love, praise, and treasure of Audrey moved him into a life of service to death.

Cute baby alert!

I’m a ridiculous dad. Out of the gates I was enamored by my baby to the point where I wasn’t even sure she was mine. I would study her features that I thought were flawless and said. Hmm don’t see any bulgy eyes or awkward body shape… Are you sure she’s mine? I had heard every parent thinks their baby is cute. But I wasn’t prepared to actually think it. Someone would come up to me and say she is so cute… and I would graciously say “yes I think so too” But not long after, someone said to me “wow she’s really pretty.” And I didn’t have any issue piping up “Oh my Gosh! I know!” And be so excited that someone could see what I could see. The thing is … I spend a majority of my time with my daughter saying things like “you are so cute, I love you so much, you are the best, you are …” And blather on about something complimentary. I’m sure a psychologist can argue that this is great for a baby’s formation and security. But I’m not doing it so that she can have a great self esteem. I’m doing it because I want to. It is a natural outflow of who I am. Here I am praising my baby. You’re cute you’re cute you’re cute. It’s enough to bore anyone but me.

CS Lewis helped me understand this a bit more when he writes in his reflection of the psalms:

I had never noticed that all enjoyment spontaneously overflows into praise unless . . . shyness or the fear of boring others is deliberately brought in to check it. The world rings with praise — lovers praising their mistresses, readers their favorite poet, walkers praising the countryside, players praising their favorite game — praise of weather, wines, dishes, actors, motors, horses, colleges, countries, historical personages, children, flowers, mountains, rare stamps, rare beetles, even sometimes politicians or scholars. . . . Except where intolerably adverse circumstances interfere, praise almost seems to be inner health made audible. . . . I had not noticed either that just as men spontaneously praise whatever they value, so they spontaneously urge us to join them in praising it: ‘Isn’t she lovely? Wasn’t it glorious? Don’t you think that magnificent?’ The Psalmists in telling everyone to praise God are doing what all men do when they speak of what they care about….

I think we delight to praise what we enjoy because the praise not merely expresses but completes the enjoyment; it is its appointed consummation. It is not out of compliment that lovers keep on telling one another how beautiful they are; the delight is incomplete until it is expressed. It is frustrating to have discovered a new author and not to be able to tell anyone how good he is; to come suddenly, at the turn of the road, upon some mountain valley of unexpected grandeur and then to have to keep silent because the people with you are with care for it no more than for a tin can in the ditch; to hear a good joke and find no one to share it with. . . .

If it were possible for a created soul fully . . . to ‘appreciate’, that is, to love and delight in, the worthiest object of all, and simultaneously at every moment to give this delight perfect expression, then that soul would be in supreme happiness. . . . To see what the doctrine really means, we must suppose ourselves to be in perfect love with God — drunk with, drowned in, dissolved by, that delight which, far from remaining pent up within ourselves as incommunicable, hence hardly tolerable, bliss, flows out from us incessantly again in effortless and perfect expression, our joy is no more separable from the praise in which it liberates and utters itself than the brightness a mirror receives is separable from the brightness it sheds. The Scotch catechism says that man’s chief end is ‘to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.’ But we shall then know that these are the same thing. Fully to enjoy is to glorify. In commanding us to glorify Him, God is inviting us to enjoy Him”

So is it boring to enjoy a life of praise? Is it boring to enjoy an eternity of praise? Is heaven’s chant, and call and refrain tiresome? An unending expression that completes our delight; Inner health made audible? Full enjoyment, and demands and commands for you to enjoy. Surely this is only boring and ungenuine, if we don’t see the reality of who we are praising.

Yet it was that boring silly chant that compelled the Angels to rip open the air. Blaze with their glory. In front of the shepherds and yell at the top of their lungs “glory to God in the highest.” They could see a reality that was worth telling somebody about. Just like the good joke, or the lovely mountain, or the cute baby, It isn’t fully enjoyed until you have ripped open the air with your heart expressed how wonderful this is, and asked “DO YOU SEE WHAT I SEE.”

They knew who they were praising. The reality was made known to them that this child would stand forth among humanity as the light of the world. What did this mean? “In him was life and the life was the light of men.” A light of such power that the darkness in the world cannot extinguish it. Light means both energy and knowledge. The Angels knew that from this baby born there came the energy and knowledge by which human beings could be delivered from evil and enabled to live life as it ought to be lived.

That with this child, the alcoholic, prostitute and poor would gain access to the kingdom of heaven. Those that trusted in this child would become virtuous and happy, easy in themselves, and useful to others. They would gain eternal life now that would lead them to heaven; to God the Judge, the lover of all, and to the man himself Jesus the Mediator of the new covenant. They would participate in the religion of love; the law of kindness brought to light by the good news. They were celebrating the reality that all who receive this son will enjoy God and themselves: and this would begin to give them the character of the one they praise, make them like God; lovers of all; contented in their lives; and crying out at their death, in calm assurance, ‘O grave, where is your victory! Thanks be unto God, who gives me the victory, through my Lord Jesus Christ.’”

Through this baby a worldwide moral revolution would take place. And what that would mean is that the population of the earth would become transformed into the “Children of light.” Ordinary human beings in their ordinary positions in life were appointed and empowered by this baby born to be in each of their peculiar places, “the light of the world.” It would be no more possible to hide them than it is possible to hide a city on a hill.

It is this, that these Angels in their Boring little scary voice praised “Glory to God!” because they knew that at in the birth of this child the WAR WAS WON!

And though the Shepherds probably didn’t know the full expression of what the Harold angels sung. They knew what a king was, and they knew that some pretty strange creatures were excited about it. So they decided to look for themselves. And they got to see a newborn king.

Hark the herald angels sing
"Glory to the newborn King!
Peace on earth and mercy mild
God and sinners reconciled"
Joyful, all ye nations rise
Join the triumph of the skies
With the angelic host proclaim:
"Christ is born in Bethlehem"
Hark! The herald angels sing
"Glory to the newborn King!"

Christ by highest heav'n adored
Christ the everlasting Lord!
Late in time behold Him come
Offspring of a Virgin's womb
Veiled in flesh the Godhead see
Hail the incarnate Deity
Pleased as man with man to dwell
Jesus, our Emmanuel
Hark! The herald angels sing
"Glory to the newborn King!"

Hail the heav'n-born Prince of Peace!
Hail the Son of Righteousness!
Light and life to all He brings
Ris'n with healing in His wings
Mild He lays His glory by
Born that man no more may die
Born to raise the sons of earth
Born to give them second birth
Hark! The herald angels sing
"Glory to the newborn King!

Why are Christians so Mean?

As thanksgiving and the holidays approach, it’s important to get ready to spend time with those people who we call “family”. Many of us get ready by cooking up a turkey or another special dish; others carefully polish their body armor to dawn as they enter the battlefield known as the living room.

The holidays have a tendency to bring out the fight in us. Mom, Dad and the siblings crawling all over each other… cutting on each other… each knowing the RIGHT way to go about things, and are clear about the fact that you didn’t do it that way. It’s in these moments that we sometimes call upon our faith.

It’s been said: “Jesus SAVED me from my family.” And someone might read the passage in Luke 14:26 and say “Hate your mother and father… wow this disciple thing is for ME!” or Luke 14:12 and say “hallelujah Jesus said I shouldn’t invite my family for dinner.” And so they flee to the church because their family of origin seems to be a monstrous place where they cannot measure up, or they just need a break.

Yet within the walls of the church we find things are not so different. Some may find solace in the faint glow of stained glass; however, it probably won’t be too long before they run into a Christian that is mean. It seems everyone has a story where someone who was “of the faith” slimed them with their “good intentions”.

I’ve been mean before. I know it’s hard to imagine, but as I was thinking about family and the holidays I remember the very first couple years that I was getting to know my brother in law. I was a new Christian, a university student of the bible. And though I learned many things I still draw upon, I also learned something else: The RIGHT way to live. Or more importantly: The right way to TELL people how to live. I was a little copycat at the time, slurping up the gems from school and radio, and anything anyone could tell me about my faith. And with that massive ingestion of knowledge, I got a hefty amount of opinion. That I in tern dealt out

Now, I never was really into my sister’s boyfriends. It wasn’t really a territory I felt like chumming it up around. It might have been I felt protective, or perhaps I felt like it wasn’t really my place to say. Regardless, as a basic principle, I just disapproved. I wasn’t as vocal about my disapproval as my friend Tim was of his sister’s boyfriend where they would weekly TP his car. But the disapproval was still there.

As my sister’s boyfriend became more and more a fixture, I began to try to find more and more wrong with him. This, I can attest, is not a good solution for budding family relations, because you will find what you look for. Well, one day, I found it. My sister and he stated that they would “live together” in New York. My mom wasn’t pleased and she phoned my sister saying “I know you are adults, but I don’t like this plan.” She knew that she wasn’t about to change the mind of her 27 year old daughter, but she could at least say she stood up for what she thought was right. My sister made her decision, and my mom being wise, left it at that.

I, on the other hand, KNEW what was RIGHT, and studied what was RIGHT, and probably even had statistics to back up what I knew to be RIGHT. And what my sister was to about to embark upon was WRONG. And to me, it all pointed to one thing: My sister’s boyfriend was not godly!

Well, this had major implications to my treatment of him. I found ways to badmouth him when I got the chance. I didn’t really engage him when he came over. And all the while, I was very vocal about my faith.

Little did I know how destructive these tendencies were of mine; especially to someone I would see more and more often. I had learned by my Christian trainers that a way to get someone to feel bad about their sin is to be mean. Eventually Eric became my brother in law. I tolerated him, but I used my faith to make sure he was distant from me. “He wasn’t Godly… I was… and this is why…” (Very Luke 18:11 yuck) It was only a couple years ago that I found out that his dad had a similar reaction to his faith. His belief structure allowed for him to belittle, and find reason to cut you down… and out. Surely Eric, with mine and his dad’s example, has never seen a glimpse of Christianity that didn’t have a mean streak.

I think being mean is one of the big things that causes fights during the holidays, and really causes people within the church to never want to go back. So I ask the question: Why are Christians so mean?

Below, in the comments, I would love to hear your answers on why Christians are so mean. Also I would love to hear your survival stories (or confessions) on how you were treated.

It’s freaky to write this history of contempt down. At the time it was justified, and now it’s just embarrassing. Thankfully my brother in law is a good man, and never turned the tables on me. He very easily could have pulled out the Sermon on the Mount when I went through a divorce years ago. He could have told me “Judge not lest ye be judged…” and he would have been right. Maybe not necessarily for kicking me while I was down, but rather, telling me the state of my heart when I judged him.

It’s interesting that in my contempt and Judgment of my brother in law’s actions, I still wanted him to see me as righteous. And, at the same time, I wanted him to act in a similar fashion as I did. How sad that I wanted him to “Come to Jesus”, if you will, through my ways of disrespect and contempt.

Perhaps the reason why so many people found healing in Jesus is he didn’t disrespect them or hold them in his eyes as less than. He was a master of the heart. And when someone’s heart was full of shame, he showed them that there was a kingdom for them as well: a heavenly father who cared for their soul, and desired for them to know that they were accepted. Jesus wasn’t mean to mean righteous people either, he was clear. He delivered a sermon on the top of a hill that showed people how you might go about living if you wanted to have the love of God. At first he dealt with someone’s anger and contempt of others. For if we remove our anger and self righteousness at our brother we are almost halfway to life in the kingdom. But listen to what he has to say about condemnation of those you feel are not “living the RIGHT way.”

Matt 7:1-6: "Do not judge so that you will not be judged. For in the way you judge, you will be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you.”
“Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' and behold, the log is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye.”
“Do not give what is holy to dogs, and do not throw your pearls before swine, or they will trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces."

This is a passage that hits at the very core of mean Christianity. This passage shows that how we view others in our hearts is the key to helping them.

Judging
initially, someone might see the flaw in Jesus’ logic if we were to simply not to judge. To be clear, Jesus is not talking about discernment. Could you imagine if you had a dentist that told you when you opened your mouth: “I’m sorry my faith prevents me from telling you about your teeth. I just can’t make that judgment call anymore.” When Jesus uses this word judge, he is specifically using the word that implies condemnation. Condemning someone is writing them off as a person. When you condemn a house, you are stating that the house is no longer truly a house. An example of a condemned person at the time of Jesus was a leper. Today many condemn the homeless, the elderly, etc. They see them as “less than.”

We can underline what Jesus is talking about by using the example of our dentist: what if he despised those who didn’t take care of their teeth? The scenario is: you open your mouth and all of the sudden he yells at you “GET OUT! I can’t work with someone who doesn’t have the same values about tooth care that I do.” This is a ridiculous example, but the words of Jesus still apply: as a dentist, you would see him as unprofessional, and you would probably warn your friends to not go to him. Isn’t it interesting in light of this passage, that we regularly see preachers condemning certain people to hell, or to heresy, yet they aren’t considered unprofessional. It is the preacher’s job to tell a clear story, and it is important to be able to discern what heresy is and what are characteristics of darkness that will not inherit the Kingdom of God. But to condemn, cut off, or write off a person as a person because of their behavior, means that you have demeaned their humanity and their potential. By putting them in this place, you have for fitted your ability to help them. And that is why Jesus makes fun of what you are trying to do with his next example.

Logging
Using a silly picture of someone with a log in their eye helping get a speck out of someone else’s eye, Jesus shows us how our condemnation of someone is really a deterrent to our helpful motives. Many have interpreted Jesus’ LOG as “your sin”, using this passage to explain that you need to be sinless to cast the first stone; Looking within for your own LOG before being justified in condemning someone else. But with the understanding of the condemning Judgementalism that exists in the passage before it, we see that the log is in actuality the condemnation that you have for the other. Jesus is clever in saying condemnation, especially with its usual accompaniments of anger and contempt and self righteousness, blinds us to the reality of the other person. We cannot “see clearly” how to assist our brother because we cannot see our brother. We will never know how to truly help someone until we have grown into the kind of person who does not condemn.

Pearling
But some may say:”I’m RIGHT though.” And they might be… And their self worth is mixed into telling someone how WRONG they are. Why does correcting someone fail as a strategy for helping them?

Jesus addresses this with some animal props. He uses dogs and pigs to show how important it is to help others with strategies that are helpful. Looking at the text at the time things that were holy and set apart for God were things that were in the temple. Things like lampstands, alters, and curtains. A simple question: What sort of help is it to give some curtains to a dog? Same question different animal: Does it help a pig if you feed in pearls? The answer is no help. Someone said to me that at most the dog would have a place to pee. It’s not about the worthiness of pigs or dogs, rather it’s about their needs. Pigs can’t digest pearls, and a dog doesn’t understand “holy.” When we offer things that have no relevance, the object of our offerings may turn on us, devouring us! Our attempt to offer our “pearls” and “holy things” actually keeps us from paying attention to those whom we are trying to help. Many well intentioned Christians have been taught that it is better to deliver RIGHT pearls of holy wisdom than to be kind. And so they become mean. Making sure that the one condemned knows why they are condemned.

So this is my answer:
The reason why Christians are so mean is because they have learned that it is better to be RIGHT than it is to be Christ like. They’ve learned to condemn and cut off others because of their beliefs, and would be happy to share their RIGHT beliefs with you so that they can justify that they are better than you. Thus completing the rejection

It just so happens that I am going to see my brother in law next week. And I think it’s time, after more than a decade, that I eat some humble pumpkin pie, and perhaps apologize for my monstrous behavior in our early relationship. UGH how embarrassing!

We don’t have to be mean. We can set aside our anger and condemnation. And even set aside other’s condemnation of us. (Can you imagine?) We can choose to be discerning without judging, and we can keep our good things to ourselves when they won’t be understood.

Is It Spiritual To Be Poor?

Luke 12:13-21

Someone in the crowd said to Him, "Teacher, tell my brother to divide the family inheritance with me."

But He said to him, "Man, who appointed Me a judge or arbitrator over you?" Then He said to them, "Beware, and be on your guard against every form of greed; for not even when one has an abundance does his life consist of his possessions."And He told them a parable, saying, "The land of a rich man was very productive."And he began reasoning to himself, saying, 'What shall I do, since I have no place to store my crops?'"Then he said, 'This is what I will do: I will tear down my barns and build larger ones, and there I will store all my grain and my goods.'And I will say to my soul, "Soul, you have many goods laid up for many years to come; take your ease, eat, drink and be merry."'"But God said to him, 'You fool! This very night your soul is required of you; and now who will own what you have prepared?'

"So is the man who stores up treasure for himself, and is not rich toward God."

I grew up in an upper middle class home. My dad was a good lawyer and businessman, and a good steward of his money. As a result we had a nice house, we ate 3 square meals a day and probably to a majority of Portland we were considered “rich.” Though I didn’t know anything else. As I entered grade school I found that people were considered “rich” and people were considered “poor”. It was good to be rich and bad to be poor. It was also bad to be a bully.

Poor Bullies

I’ve only been in one fight in my life and it was with a bully in 3^rd grade, and I picked that fight. For some reason my sense of justice over “cuts in line” overcame my understanding of getting my ass kicked, and so I made an effort to put Dan Clark back in his place by calling him “superman.” I was belittling him with his own name “Dan Clark -> Clark Kent -> Superman” Which doesn’t sound like a bad name to be given, but I was trained at chiding by my sister. So if you were there, you would have seen me using superman’s name in vain. Well, Dan wasn’t interested in being belittled, nor was he interested in giving up his cuts in line. So he got me in a headlock and swung me around until I started crying. Bully 1 Geoff 0.

Another instance of a bully winning and me losing was much more socio-political. Thankfully my little neck didn’t get rung, yet my brain learned a great lesson. I believe we were in science class and Matt Ducher was doing something that caused my justice alert to blink. Matt was strong, mouthy, and bullying someone in some way, and it was up to GeoffreyNeill (Since there were 3 Jeffs in my class I was one word “GeoffraNeill”) to put Matt back in his place. Well, Matt had one deficiency that I could exploit that he couldn’t help. His family was POOR. Realistically, the guy lived in the same neighborhood, and it seemed like they had some trouble financially. Matt wasn’t on school lunch program, nor was he in rags, but I knew I could put him in his place with this weakness. And so not knowing the political nightmare in which I was entering, I uttered the words in a very evil “girl in a back-to-school-special” type of fashion. “Well… You’re Poor!” Matt’s bullying didn’t overshadow what I had just done. It was like the record scratched and everyone knew that I delivered a blow lower than the balls.

Peter Ventrella, was there at the time. He wasn’t best friends with Matt. He was friends with everyone. He was sort of like the fonz of gradeschool. Also he was a part of the “poor” crowd, but because he was so cool, and not a bully he wasn’t a target. However my low blow brought into full swing the power of Peter’s tongue. It wasn’t 3 seconds after my comment that peter said with authority: “Well at least he’s not a RICH BITCH.” (Keep in mind this is gradeschool, and bitch hadn’t been accepted by radio and TV yet)

I knew I was out of line. Peter had got me, and I was the gradeschool Dick. I very quickly learned that economics weren’t one to mess with someone about. Because making someone feel bad because they were poor was like pissing on someone’s grandma. So I learned my lesson. I didn’t want to be that kind of guy that put down others because of their economic standing. Another lesson that I learned at the same time, however, was someone could easily be made fun of for being rich. Being poor was being street, and edgy. Being rich made you a BITCH.

Hiding in High School

As a freshman in High School I rolled with the poor kids. I felt like I had to hide because of my neighborhood. My clothes were purchased to blend in. I didn’t dare get a ride home. I learned that to be poor was the way to be regular, if they knew I lived in my neighborhood they would treat me differently. They wouldn’t be my friend any more. They wouldn’t joke with me. Wealth had social implications to it. Rich hung out with rich kids, poor hung out with poor kids. I was the odd one trying to blend into a NON-BITCH environment. Our economics teacher who was a full on socialist would add fuel to the fire by singling out the rich kids and making them feel like fools for their parents decisions to pursue capitalism. Realistically, though I cannot say that there was one person who would tell me this without getting in trouble, I learned in school that being rich is evil and being poor is good.

Christian Underline

When I became a Christian at 20, life changed for me, and I had many things to work out. One thing I didn’t have to figure out, though, was my view of wealth. As I listened to a constant haranguing about the virtues of giving, I was also inundated with the beatitudes of “blessed are the poor”. I was influenced by John Wesley who said that if you don’t give all you have he has no more hope for you than that of Judas Iscariot. I was taken by Jesus’ decision to tell the rich young ruler to sell all and then in the same breath tell everyone that it’s nearly impossible for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God. It reinforced something in my upbringing that said: “The rich are bitches.” Money is evil. And it is spiritual to be poor.

So I ask that question: IS IT SPIRITUAL TO BE POOR?

We are affected by finances every day. It is a super personal thing. It is no question that Jesus was right when he said where your treasure is there your heart will be also. And so it is because of the link to our hearts that I ask “is it Godly to have no money?” Below are some Christian misconceptions that have been taught in my life, telling me that I should hate money because it is evil.

• · In Luke’s Gospel Jesus says “Blessed are the poor.”
• · In Luke 12 We run across a farmer whose life is taken because he has a whole lot of crops
• · Rich Young ruler being told he needs to sell everything and follow him to have eternal life
• · Jesus not too long after says that it is as easy for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven as a camel to go through the eye of a needle.
• · In Timothy we hear that money is the root of all evil
• · Outside the bible we see St. Francis and Dominic taking vows of poverty

Very quickly I want to address each of these because I think we have to be informed, you can skip ahead if you don’t care.

• · Luke’s Gospel - Blessed are the poor: Their poverty is not the contingency for blessedness… their trust in Jesus is what gives the poor “POSSESSION of the kingdom of God”
• · Farmer – God’s going to kill you if you build silos –wealth is deceptive and makes us think we have it put together (that was the message Jesus was getting at.)
• · Rich Young ruler – We need to sell all – If we allow our wealth to keep us from trusting in God, we really will not inherit the eternal life from above. Because something is more important, and will take precedence
• · Camel Eye of a needle –It’s important to see here that Jesus didn’t say “it is so much easier for the poor to enter the kingdom of heaven.” It isn’t. It’s specifically difficult for the rich in this instance because they have been deceived by their finances into thinking that their future is secure and their soul can be at rest with their savings.
• · Timothy: Money root of all evil. Here’s where reading the passage helps “ LOVE of money is the root of all evil” Paul is showing Timothy if you Love money than you will be poised to do what it takes to get money, hence even do evil.
• · Vows of poverty. Francis’ vow was a political statement for the time, like Gandhi’s fasting. Today we have people taking vows of poverty. But really they are vows of non-possession. Their order or church takes care of them. We think of it as better because there is simplicity about it, and they are taken care of. But it really isn’t poverty; if it was poverty they would very quickly be feeling not-spiritual.

Below I have devised a wonderful question that allows us to see a little more clearly:

Answer the following:
Who is more spiritual?

A Jesus following Businessman who lives an upper class lifestyle, is a good steward of his money, and allocates his finances towards the various good that he has prayerfully decided.

A Jesus following person who works 9-5 in a diner and gives most of what he has away.

These points out our economic bias. It also points out what we really think. Some of us would love to have wealth so that we can get the stuff we want. But we are working off of software that is saying. Wealth is evil.

Some of us might think this because we haven’t really thought through the guilt by association. For instance: there are people out there that are putting their efforts towards banning guns, because guns kill. But in reality guns just sit there. Or they look cool. It takes someone picking up that gun and pointing it at me that kills. So we’ve heard the slogan, Guns don’t kill people, people kill people. We also have to be real with the fact that a gun accelerates the matter. But without the intention to kill, we see a gun acting very docile.

The same thing works for money. Many have witnessed finances accelerating the process of evil. Yet this is only a reflection of the person holding and using that money. If the money were to sit in a bank somewhere it would simply accrue interest.

Poverty

To become poor to be spiritual is sort of like wanting to itch your back so you put on a straightjacket. You might accomplish your purposes but there are better ways. When someone spiritualizes poverty they really are not describing poverty. They are actually describing non-possession. They are saying “ahh to be homeless is to have it so good.” But really what they are saying is to be free from the responsibility of possession is a great idea. But anybody who has lived in poverty knows that Poverty is uncool. It makes people feel like God isn’t helping them. Poverty moves people to true desperation where there is no hope. We need to be real with what it is. Non-possession on the other hand can be awesome if you are taken care of, but realistically you have given over your own responsibility to someone else to take care of you. This is not poverty. Poverty is not spiritual; it is the lack of resources that strangle one into desperation

Wealth
Money is easier to live with but it can be deceptive. But just like poverty it isn’t spiritual either. Because you are wealthy doesn’t mean you are IN the Kingdom of God.

Both are statuses that have nothing to do with functioning in the Kingdom of God. There will always be the poor and always be the rich. If you remember when Jesus was on this earth there were poor people and rich people. When the early church was established there were poor people and rich people. There was a distribution of wealth but that didn’t mean that there weren’t those people who needed that wealth, and the others who provided that wealth. There were poor churches in Jerusalem, and rich churches in Corinth. I am not saying that if you are poor that is your lot in life and vice versa if you are rich. You can do whatever to become whatever. But what I’m saying is: that neither is more righteous. God uses both. People who are in Poverty, God will work on removing your entitlement, and it also makes for an environment to cultivate thankfulness. When you have Abundance; God will work on removing your hoarding or greed, and it also makes for an environment to cultivate generosity.

So each isn’t more spiritual or less spiritual but God definitely uses both to develop our character.

Three words:

Possession – Possession is not evil. According to Genesis 1:28 it is actually part of the blessing of being created in the image of God that we would govern over the land, the zoological creatures, etc. To govern over something is to be human. Possession is an extension of our “rule.” Our finances are an extension of our bodies. The issue is we can’t have our possessions possess us. That’s where most of us run into difficulty. But to actually possess a house, a job, a family, a bank account, is not an evil thing. If you think giving is a good thing, yet you don’t like possessing, consider that you cannot truly give something unless you first possess it.

Use – I’m using this word in its negative context. Like someone would USE drugs or USE another person. In a financial context using money means that they use it to accomplish THEIR purposes, not functioning in a greater good. An example of using money would be buying a sex slave, or World War II atrocities like Auschwitz. The German people paid for that. Using money in this context IS evil. It has varying degrees obviously. But here’s the interesting thing: You don’t have to POSESS in order to USE. The reason why this is because you might not possess any money, yet you can still manipulate others that do have money. So whether you have money or not, the opportunity is there for you to USE it to get YOUR WAY.

Trust – Trust in riches is the issue that Jesus is trying to get at with the parable of the farmer. Trust means that you are relying on it to take care of you. Jesus would say that a fool does that. That the farmer didn’t have a clear picture of reality. The reason why someone would make this leap, though, is because wealth is very powerful. You have the ability to USE it to accomplish your purposes. And many would say that if they got a million dollars. They would be set. This is trusting that their money will take care of them. Which realistically it will buy opportunities. But Jesus was trying to let us understand that our father in the heavens has the ability to take care of us much better than paper.

Possession isn’t evil, Using is because it disregards the greater good, and trusting money is letting your USING move you into a fantasy world that is delusional.

There are two spiritual disciplines that are the opposite of Using and allow your Possessions to be allocated towards Good.
Frugality – Not being wasteful, prudently saving, spending smart.
Stewardship - Managing property, finances, or other affairs well.
With both of these I am implying that you are interested in loving God with your possessions and finances.

Today
Today I do not live in my parent’s neighborhood. I don’t have my parents’ money. I don’t consider myself rich or poor, but I am ONLY scraping by. I dove into the bible to see what God has to say about money and I feel like I have a better perspective on finances because of it. Today I see wealth for what it is: an opportunity to do good. I see poverty for what it is: a difficult situation that when looked at properly is tragic. Poverty isn’t a spiritual bump on the god totem pole. The best thing that I have learned is that Just because someone is rich doesn’t mean they’re a bitch; their possessions don’t make them evil.

The sad thing is that one of the reasons I dove into the bible is because I wanted to learn what God had to say about money. So I could have more. Totally trying to USE God to suit my needs. Thankfully he has helped me with this understanding. What I realized is that if I want more money (which actually isn’t an evil thing as long as my heart is in check) I better start living frugally. I better become a good steward of my finances. So by studying the bible I realized that my first step towards more money was to make a budget and keep it. That was my first spiritual step toward not Using money and not Trusting in money. It was to learn where my money was actually going and allocate it properly. It seemed very high school personal finance, but since then, we have been living within our means, less out of control. And we have even been saving.

So today, I wanted you to know that it is good to possess. And with this information I give you, you can do with it what you wish. You can USE it to buy a new silo. Maybe you want to TRUST in it. Maybe you just want to give it away. But today I would hope that you take this information, and be a good steward with it.